The ultimate how-to guide for her

Tease him: When men realise you’re going down on them, they get all excited just thinking about what’s to come. Tease him by kissing from his mouth, down his stomach, to his inner thighs. Blow air on his balls and tongue-flick them. Lick around his penis into the skin folds, he’ll love it!

Go the grab: “Curl your fingers around his penis and hold it with medium pressure,” says Kate Taylor, author of A Woman’s Guide To Sex ($45, Hardie Grant). “If the head bulges, or his eyes do, you’re too firm.”

Move into licking: Lightly lick all over the top of his penis. Keep licking the very tip, then go down and focus on the ridge just under the head.

Get ready to suck: “Cover your teeth with your lips and, still holding the shaft, slide him in your mouth,” says Taylor. “Run your tongue all over it, up and down the sides, really swirl it around. Move your head up and down his penis, sucking gently.”

Mix it up with your hands: When his penis is fairly wet from your saliva, take him out of your mouth and firmly run your hands up and down it.

Should I spit or swallow?

It’s up to you. The word from the male camp? Either is good, as long as you’ve got it in your mouth. Here are a few techniques to help you decide …

The art of spitting: While most men don’t mind whether you drink it down or cough it up, they do like coming in your mouth. So, if you can bear it, simply hold the stuff in your mouth until he’s finished, then spit. A glass of juice, or something with flavour, will wash away the taste.

The art of swallowing: Make things easier for yourself and get him to come towards the back of your mouth. There are fewer taste buds and it’ll help you swallow it in one go. Also, 80 per cent of what we taste is linked to smell so, if it’s dark, hold your nose – he won’t see. And, in case you’re wondering, the average ejaculation has 21-29 kilojoules, which is the same as a piece of sugar-free chewing gum.

The art of doing neither: Don’t think you have to let him come in your mouth. Newsflash: you don’t.Whisper in his ear and ask him to tell you when he’s about to let loose.

The ultimate how-to guide for him

The big tease: Women need a lot longer to get turned on than guys, so make sure she gets ample warm-up time … Kiss, touch, stroke her lips, ears, hands, neck, breasts, inner thighs and lower tummy – they are all erogenous zones, so paying attention to these areas is a sure-fire winner. Think slow and sensuous.

Preparing the ground: This is not an attack! Don’t go diving straight for the clitoris with superman force. Pay attention to the whole area and start very gently. Most guys find it easier to spread open the lips of the vagina with their fingers first.

Tongue tickling: The No. 1 rule is to keep your tongue flat. “Run it up and down in the grooves of her vagina, starting gently and gradually increasing pressure,” advise Emma Taylor and Lorelei Sharkey, co-authors of The Big Bang (Hodder & Stoughton, $34.95). “Kiss her like you’re kissing her mouth. Vary between long, firm licks and sucking.”

Hitting the spot: Listen to subtle clues from her body. And “move her clitoris side to side with your tongue,” say Taylor and Sharkey. “Then, take it in your mouth and gently wind your tongue around it in circular motions. A little suction can be nice but don’t be trying to give her a love bite down there.”

DO

DON’T

Stop when she’s nearing climax, it’s like a ‘return to start’ card.

Take her groans as a signal to go harder and faster.

Use teeth, unless you’re a pro at gentle nibbles.