Choose the right partner

This may seem like a given, but you’d be surprised how many people are bumping booty with their sexual opposite. Not only do you need to like your partner’s moves, you have to mesh with their style, otherwise someone could lose an eye.

“I didn’t realise how badly-matched my ex and I were in bed until I started seeing someone new,” reveals Marianne, 24. “He liked it quite rough and fast, whereas I’m more of a slow, sexual kind of girl. Finding someone I clicked with made me truly enjoy sex for the first time.”

So how do you work out whether you and him are destined to clash or climax? Write a list of all the things you like in bed, then ask him what he likes and compare.

If you cross over more than 50 per cent, that’s great because you can always work on making the others match. Anything less and you may have to perform a partner sexorcism.

Flick the fret factor

If there’s one thing guaranteed to make your good sex basket overflow, it’s being confident and happy in yourself.

Nothing puts a fizzer on an orgasm quite like wondering if he can see that huge pimple on your chin.

“Confidence is a fantastic aphrodisiac,” says lifecoach Lisa Phillips, (www.amazingcoaching.com.au). “Most men don’t take much notice of our lumps and bumps. Just being comfortable and relaxed helps you open up and connect with your partner.”

So there’s no need to be a sex bomb and strut around the bedroom, Christina Aguilera-style. Just work out what your good points are and utilise them. For instance, if you have a nice voice, read an erotic story out loud. If you’re a good dancer, try a strip tease.

If you have soft hands, give him a massage. If you’re pretty flexible, try a tricky position. Knowing you have a never-fail sex trick in your back pocket will set your confidence on fire.

Don’t let your sex drive die

The number one thing that will wipe out your sex life quicker than an in-law invasion is tiredness. Needing more sleep, being too busy to bonk or getting sick of the same old moves are all sexual zappers. But here’s the thing – the less you have sex, the less you feel like it.

Yep, sex is a beast that needs to be fed, and the less food you give it, the smaller its appetite becomes.

To awaken the sleeping giant and shift your sex drive into gear, you need to hit the sack. No one is suggesting you force sex, but if your horny button is buzzing even a little, take the yes option rather than the no.

“My non-existent sex drive almost ruined my relationship,” admits Eve, 25. “Thankfully I ended up taking energy-boosting vitamins and we tried doing it in the morning rather than at night. Once I started having sex regularly I found I craved it more. Now when my boyfriend isn’t around, I even pleasure myself!”

Let yourself enjoy it!

Sex is like chocolate -- it’s best when you savour it. So forget worrying about work, your performance, your body, or even what’s going to happen in five minutes. Just enjoy the moment. Take in the sounds and smells, focus on where he’s touching you, close your eyes and think about how good it’s all feeling.

“Having inhibitions can make you hold back and not fully engage in sex,” says Dr Suzy Green, clinical and coaching psychologist. “Free your mind and body of tension and be open to the experience. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want and challenge old habits.”

To really lose yourself in the moment, indulge in extended foreplay, a warm, sexy bed and mood music and lighting. Soaking in all the elements will help you appreciate sex more and make it feel that much better!