Now here’s credibility for you: Dr John Gottman (gottman.com) is a psychologist and mathematician from the University of Washington who’s been studying couples since 1973.

After watching you and your partner talk for an hour, he can predict, with 95 per cent accuracy, whether you’ll still be together in 15 years. Long story short, he codes all your emotions with numbers, runs them through a mathematical model and, boom, your future is decided. According to Gottman, there are five things that make or break a romantic union. Here, the love oracle imparts his wisdom.

Break-up issue 1:

There’s no filter between what you think and what you say. A good editor cuts the crap and keeps the quality. When talking to your man, you need to take a similar approach. “Edit yourself,” suggests Gottman. “Couples who avoid saying every
critical thought when discussing touchy topics are consistently the happiest.”

Break-up issue 2:

You launch into arguments like a human firearm.Turning a conversation into verbal warfare is easy to do – just one snarky comment can set it off. Gottman advocates a far more chilled-out approach. “Bring up problems gently and without blame,” he recommends.

To do this, use “I” language (“I feel upset that you bought it without speaking to me first”); make it clear you’re a team (“This is our problem”); and try humour or changing the topic if the matter is less important.

Break-up issue 3:

He’s inflexible and unable to compromise for you.Women are generally very good at compromising for their partners – it’s the guys who need to give a little. For example, if your boyfriend point-blank refuses to skip a drinking session with his mates on the night of your mum’s 50th, you’ve got yourself a problem. According to Gottman, “A true partnership only occurs when a man can accept influence from his girlfriend or wife.”

Break-up issue 4:

You tolerate bad behaviour. From day one, you shouldn’t put up with nastiness. Always call him on it and explain why it hurts or upsets you. “The lower the level of tolerance for bad behaviour in the beginning of a relationship, the happier the couple
will be down the road,” says Gottman.